“When you release expectations, you are free to enjoy things for what
they are instead of what you think they should be.”
This topic resonates with me as I hope it will touch you as well. Have you ever had unrealistic expectations of your dating or marriage partner? I know I have. It happens when I think I am doing more work than he is contributing. Or when I am tired at night after work and need to make dinner after a long drive home when he is retired and around the home most of the day. It also happened when we first got married. The expectations I had of him as a marriage partner was based on my own personal experience with my parents relationship. However, I quickly learned that his upbringing, although similar in many ways to mine with values, the way each of our parents divide the household chores was quite different. It also impacted our lives when my husband slowed down and then finally retired. In his retirement, my expectation was not to be with him 24/7, go shopping or have lunch together. Except for an occasional “date” lunch. Breakfast and dinner darling, but not for lunch! However his parents spent most of each day together, whereas mine, each had their own interests to keep them busy throughout the day and then they came together to share their day over dinner. So, how do you deal with your expectations, realistic or not? Communicate. Whether it is difficult or not, it is important to address expectations you might have when you enter into your marriage. Talk about these Big Decisions as we addressed in our last book, Marrying Later in Life. The major ones are finances, children, home decisions and responsibilities for each of you in your marriage. Sharing these issues will actually bring you closer to your partner than further apart. Let us know what you have experienced and come back soon!